I was honored to officiate at two weddings in November.
Both were based on a Catholic wedding structure, but the similarity mostly ends there.
The first one completed was for a mixed faith couple. The groom was a lightweight Catholic of Philippine descent, his bride's ancestry was Korean Buddhist. I had the pleasure of watching many of the Buddhist rituals in the short version of a wedding ceremony that honored her faith and family before the western ritual that I was to officiate. It was a beautiful ceremony.
After a short break for the wedding party to change change their attire while the crowd reassembled outside for the second ceremony, I led the wedding party down the aisle to the western ceremony space. At their request I substituted prayers with a Buddhist flavor into the western ceremony and wrote a narration about the light of Gods love and the cycle of family love for the candle lighting as a symbol of unity. I read the narration as the parents of the couple tried to light their candles to start the process. The wind was just enough to prevent this. So as I finished reading the written narration, I realized that either this was going to take longer than expected or it might fail. I quickly thought up a few more bits of wisdom about how sometimes love doesn't seem to be going as planned but if we persevere and don't give up it usually does work out. ( I was hoping the candles would cooperate and make my words true. I'd be lying if I claimed they did.) The rest of the ceremony went very well.
Afterward I was complimented on the "ad lib" that it was well spoken and added to the moment. (My past experience in front of crowds of unwilling teenagers has its rewards! Now I'm good with keeping my cool and thinking on my feet because.)
This couple wrote their own vows which were very moving. I only had to help the groom with printing them out bigger and in shorter lines to make reading them easier as he was prone to tear up a little. Their vows were quite beautiful.
The second one was for a couple who had both been married before and had the teenage and young adult children to prove it. For their ceremony we went with a symbol of unity that involved the children who were also going to be the wedding party. I had the bride and groom face the audience and hold hands then offer their free hand to their eldest child who offered their free hands down the line to the youngest child. Then I had those two join their free hands to complete a circle. I wrote a lovely liturgy about how their family shared a love like a circle. Never ending and always connected. That even when they were far apart that circle would still be there for them.
When it came to exchanging of the rings, I blessed the rings as a reminder of that circle.
For vows this couple wanted me to stay closer to the catholic liturgy and to lead them through the vows. That was a lovely moment.
November has been a great month for me and weddings. I still get chills when I think about the special moments of which I was chosen to be a part.
